It seems that the need to push out to the most extreme position is not abating. Some extremists appear to be fuelled by righteous anger following seeing an opposing extremist’s unmoderated views on social media. Some fuelled by an innate hatred developed by decades of social conditioning that it’s so embedded that it feels genetic. Some fuelled by a need to be different in order to be noticed, to be liked, to feel connected.

“Connected” is the key. EM Forster, English humanist and novelist wrote about the personal need to connect and the barriers often encountered to doing so. The difficulties in connecting form the basis of Forster’s novels be it a fumbling personality due to lack of confidence or the complexities of navigating social etiquette and norms.

Humans have a drive to connect, it validates us and meets a primal need that encouraged us to gather into social groups, aiding survival. It isn’t surprising that, as we disconnect through digital connection, we look for simple causes to make us feel part of a group. Our need to be recognised then requires us to seen as interesting, not just compared with the few dozen of people in our social group, but with the millions of people we are exposed to online.

Evolution has also ensured that we prioritise a path of survival, of self-protection. It’s a natural tendency then to put out our persona’s in a way that focuses on hatred, bitterness and sarcasm – just something that doesn’t leave us open and exposed. This is much easier than putting out something as fragile as love.

There are some whose extremism is a form of love – but not many. Some that start down the path with love soon end up on a course of anger and hatred: love the planet, hate the oil companies; love my god, hate your god; love my team, hate your team; love animals, hate farmers.

Modern tribalism is often digital. The “love mine, hate yours / love me, hate you” digital backdrop has become a wallpaper to our lives – influencing and programming us and our children. Real world tribalism can be fuelled, funded and garnering by digital support.

We haven’t evolved to sit in chairs, never mind interact with millions of people online. We are a species out of control, patting ourselves on the back for our ingenuity and superiority – meanwhile ignoring the foundations of humanity and letting the evolved base fundamental needs parade around like nuclear weapons, all in the name of “freedom”.

In the meantime extremists are avoiding the simple truths. Extreme love is worthwhile, obvious and powerful. Extreme hate will kill millions, ruin the lives of tens of millions and maybe, one day, deliver the end of humanity.

Let’s be gutsy. Let’s survive. Let’s connect. Let’s get on with extreme love.